Holden doesn't really get it, honestly. Like, first of all, his feelings on Jedao are weird and they fluctuate for no apparent purpose or to any logical prompt, so the degree of pity, like, that doesn't have anything to do with this, Holden thinks. But also Jedao's pride is something Holden has a hard time wrapping his head around. It seems... spiky, in unpredictable ways.

"The Admiral's not really all there right now," he says, just avoiding the subject entirely. "Look, I always considered it just a matter of time before I get you those memories, okay? Ever since I figured it out. But I don't want him giving you half, or some weird distorted version. Can you hang on for a while?" It's a question, not a command, but Holden doesn't think it's an unreasonable request. He's really leery of the Admiral playing around in Jedao's head. Anyone playing around in anyone's head, actually, but the Admiral is a little bit of a sketchy figure and enough people have had their fingers in Jedao's brainpan.